When I was a kid, I had a hard time making friends. I was always made fun of because of my height (I am 6'3" now, so I was always really tall in school.) and didn't really make a lot of friends until I was in 3rd or 4th grade. Looking back, those girls weren't my friends - I just really wanted them to be, I think - so I made myself believe they were.
So the other day when my 6 year old came to me and asked if his friends could come over, I said, "Which ones?" When he named them, I asked, "Why do you think they are your friends?" and he had nothing to say. I probed a little more, "Tell me about the things you guys do and talk about when you hang out." and "What are some of so-and-so's favorite games?" My son had nothing to say. He just looked at me and said, "Um... we just play."
WE JUST PLAY. I love it. However, being the Mom that I am, I saw this as the perfect opportunity to teach my son about friendship. So we sat down and listed ways to make new friends and how to be a good friend. It was a wonderful lesson for the both of us.
HOW TO MAKE A NEW FRIEND
F: Find something you both have in common.
R: Remember to ask their name!! Remember to use it!
I: Invite them to play with you!
E: Empathy!! (Remember, some kids are shy at first!)
N: Notice if they need something! (Help with finding a classroom, etc.)
D: Don't forget to ask, "How are you?"
S: SMILE!
HOW TO BE A GOOD FRIEND
F: Find games that you both like to play together.
R: Respect each other's space.
I: Invite them for play dates!
E: Empathy!! (Put yourself in their shoes!)
N: Never say bad things about them. Always stand up for your friends.
D: Do the right thing! Apologize if necessary!
S: Stay in touch!!
